Kiss Me First

Title: Kiss Me Fist
Author: Lottie Moggach
Genre: Philosophy, Maybe thriller
Source: Library Hardback
Rating:3 out of 5 paws

All Leila wants to do is fit in somewhere, everywhere she goes she feels outside the crowd.  That is until she finds a site called Red Pill where people discuss ethics and philosophical ideals.  Leila has found her place.  When founder Adrian asks Leila to do something outside the ordinary, she is put into a situation where ethics becomes a major question.  Her task is to pretend to be someone else, someone who has committed suicide, so that friends and family would not feel pain from their death.  Leila doesn't consider the consequences of her decision until it is too late.

So I picked up this book from the library because my boyfriend and I started watching the Netflix show Kiss Me First, that was based off this book.  I should have learned not to read books that shows are based off of, because sometimes I will be disappointed.  In this case I was.  The book is nothing close to what the show was about, the only similarities were the names, location and personalities.  Story-lines were completely different.  If they were similar I might have liked either one, the show or book better.  I liked neither.

I did enjoy the philosophical aspect of Red Pill and how Leila becomes tested in real life on the aspects of ethics and stealing a person's identity even though it isn't explained as such.  She doesn't think much on the proposition and comes across as rather impulsive rather than organized and meticulous as she is when she is Tess (with the exception of her interactions with Connor).  The whole book revolves around her being Tess, so readers don't really get much of Leila except when she is making decisions on Tess related things again like with Connor and trying to find out who he is.  I wanted a little more from Jonty, his character almost felt like an afterthought, something to throw in to give an element of risk, but we never see that element or much interaction between the two.

There were moments in the story where it got rather boring and hard to continue.  I liked the moments when the story went into present day with Leila attempting to find where Tess went.  It was almost like she was rediscovering herself through her determination to find Tess.  It was difficult to relate to any character, they didn't feel developed enough to feel a sort of connection most find with some characters. You don't really get to know them in the book, nor do you like any of them.  Everyone in the book has their own selfish agendas regardless who what their motives may be. 

I seen that Kiss Me First is marketed as a "thriller that tackles a life lived online."  I expected something we see in the show, where Leila plays an online game and lives through that or something like Sword Art Online.  The book does mention her playing World of Warcraft, but she doesn't become engrossed in it the way I was expecting it too. While we don't see her becoming engrossed in the internet as one may expect she still hides behind an avatar, the one of Tess.  She builds her own world of delusions around Connor and is then disturbed and upset that he doesn't reciprocate her feelings, but is repulsed by her actions (clearly he has every right but to Leila he is in the wrong).  Even after Adrian is exposed, she still believes he is the one in the wrong and she did nothing but help someone who wanted to die.  Which brings back the question of is assisted suicide even if the assistance is stealing one's identity ethical?

Overall I was not a fan of the book, I appreciate what it attempted to do and the questions it poses while doing it, but it all fell flat.  Nothing evoke emotion or a certain reaction while reading it. It is interesting, but not necessarily likable.